Poetry Archive

You should be glad that I don’t want to have sex with you…
…Because I want to get to know you
I want to get to know you like “What are your hopes and dreams,” get to know you
I want to get to know you like “What are your favorite Chris Rock lines,” get to know you
I want you to make me laugh, make me think, argue with me, teach me something
I want you to stimulate my mind, not my pikachu

I don’t want to get to know you like “This is how I like it” get to know you
I don’t want to get to know you like “This is where it feels good” get to know you
I don’t want to know where you’ve done it and where you want to do it
I want to explore your brain, not your body

I don’t want to “get out of here”
I don’t want to go to “your place or mine”
I don’t want you to “want me so bad”
Let’s share a meal, share a song, share a film

Sharing our bodies is the last thing on my list
A beautiful body is candy for my eyes for a moment in time
But a beautiful mind will feed me forever
A beautiful body will satiate me temporarily
But a beautiful mind will keep me thinking for long after
Pecs can’t replace knowledge, nor biceps energy
A six pack is not a witty tongue, nor a five o’clock shadow a romantic heart

I want to care about you
I want to wonder what you’re doing when I’m not with you
I want to meet your friends, a co-worker, and the deli guy who always hooks you up
I want to see you sing and dance and act a fool
I want to have an inside joke and a few “remember when’s”

I want to keep these butterflies that come along with you
I want to keep this grin that bears when I think of you
I want to keep these eyes that sigh when I look at you
I want to keep these goose bumps that appear at the touch of you

I’m not going to have sex with you…
…Because I want to get to know you.

You’re Welcome

I tell myself you’re real
That your eyes are filled with truth
That your words are meant for me
That your fingers are emitting love
That your passion is more than skin-deep

I tell myself that this time around, it’ll be better
That a different you, a different me, in the same place
Might finally find a common denominator
That when added together, will bear the same numerator
And we will finally equal one

I tell myself that you want me
That you mean more than you let on
That there is more emotion churning beneath the surface
That I will be amongst the select few who will touch you

I tell myself that you mean well
That you are a certain way that I am simply not used to
That I can’t take your actions at face value
That it’s okay to set a second standard to make what you do okay

I tell myself that I’m okay
That I have to decide what I want out of this
That I can’t expect true love from this
That I have to keep my cool
That I can’t get caught up
Until, of course, you do

I tell myself to step back, realizing, for once, that I might…actually…get hurt
That for once in my life,
I may actually want you more than you want me
That for once in my life,
I’m the prey and not the predator
That for once in my life,
I see what it’s like on the other side of the glass wall

I tell myself that it’s over,
That I have to make it over
That it must be over, inside and out
That it must be over
In my mind and in my heart and in my libido…
I have to purge myself of you
Before I lose myself to you
I’m Going Home

Time is passing by
But I am standing still
What am I missing
Why am I unfulfilled
When in my heart, I believe
That I can fly so free
That there is a purpose
Which God has in store for me
But why is it so hard
This load that I carry
It hurts my back, my heart
Every step is so lonely
As time passes by
It’s hard to keep my head up high
With no one by my side
Watching as life is lived
By those who can enjoy
Imagining how I should live
It’s just a movie in my mind
As others laugh, I cry
Wondering,
What am I doing here?
Where do I belong?
Why did You put me here?
Why did you design me?
I used to think I had a purpose
But as the days pass, I fear
That the days will turn to years
Full of dreams chased in vain
And the years into a life
Filled with tears, aches and pain
I don’t know anymore
If this is for me
I can’t do this anymore
I can’t remember “happy”
I can’t take the emotions
Up, down and all around
I’m getting motion sickness
I just want my feet on solid ground
Is it too much to ask for
To find my place in this world
I used to think I had it
I believed in myself
But the days just pass by
As my dreams sit on the shelf
What I am doing here?
As life passes by
Sometimes I wonder
Why I even try
I try to keep my head high
Take a deep breath and pray
I wake up every morning
Telling myself I’ll be okay
But even I can’t live this lie
When the doubts come out to play
Insecurity lurks around each bend
As I crawl towards the end
But no end is in sight
To help relieve the fear of this plight
I don’t want to be a burden
To friends and family
It’s not their problem
I must maintain my dignity
Put on a happy face
For all the world to see
But inside I’m breaking down
I can’t see the end
Tears are streaming down
As I hang my head to hide
The truth behind these eyes
The fear that is inside
The hope that has been shattered
And now is tossed aside
The dream that is slowly fading
As I face reality

I haven’t had a drink in 25 years
Yet here I lay, paying the price for another man’s fears
As I lie here on the ground shedding these tears
I can’t understand, can’t make sense, can’t see, can’t feel,
can’t hear

My hand to my head, now my hand, gloved in blood
Brought me back moments before, the memory begins to flood
The pain of the my head banging against the wall,
As he hit me one, two, three, four times…but wait, that’s
not all

I’m being dragged down, there’s more men than I can count up
One’s on my leg, one’s on my arms, one’s on my neck, gagging
me up
Blow by blow, they’re making sure that I’m not getting up
And then, in my ear, one growls, “I’m gonna beat your ass
up.”

And they do, I can’t see, I’m deadened, without sensation
I taste the blood, in my mouth, I spit to restore
respiration
Metal cuffs on my wrists, cutting off circulation
I can do nothing but wait for the end of this molestation

I’m a 64-year-old man, to my innocence I can attest
On the contrary, never once, did they say, “you’re under
arrest”
I’m a retired elementary school teacher,
I heard a woman scream out, “he has done nothing wrong!” I’d
like to meet her.
I’ve lived in New Orleans for 29 years, I love it here
I remember when I tried to get up, they kicked me down and
sneered
I was out buying some cigarettes when this tragedy began
I was just asking for the curfew when they took my life into
their hands
I was just saying yesterday how these men were just so swell
Through the flood, these men in blue, they did their jobs
well
But now, I lay in my blood, and they will all go to hell!

In the name of Rodney king, Amadou Diallo, and every black
man bearing the unjust, intolerable, unwarranted scars of police brutality, I
feel your strife
As I realize, I’m laying here, begging God for my life
Call it police brutality, but there’s more to it, you must
see
It’s a perversion of power, the white cop’s orgasm, the
unnecessary
Police brutality that riddles our country’s façade of unity
it’s four white men beating a black man
we’ve seen it over and over again
last time they used batons on a 25-year-old
this time, they used their fists on a 64-years-old
and they gunned down and killed amadou, a 22-year-old
four white, one black, the story’s the same
the horror, the disgust, the evil…it’s the same

Don’t tell me that our police force is just
When shit like this happens day in and day out
Think of all the videos that haven’t been shot
Think of all the men’s whose lives were degraded
Because a few good cops felt the urge to have their power
paraded

What happened to codes of honor
Men in blue
Protecting our people
Innocent till proven guilty
Keepers of the peace
Everyone’s best friend
Hell, what happened to Loving thy neighbor
When did it become OK to beat a man to death, but not quite
Cuz otherwise, police brutality becomes murder

Getting away with that is way harder
But with this, we’ll get a suspension,
maybe cause some squad tension
But the worst of it will probably be just some unwanted
attention

And you know what’s craziest, in the midst of it all
That this heart is not hurt, it’s still full and standing
tall

He says that he does not believe that this is an act of
discrimination
Bless his heart, he even hired a white lawyer for
representation

Crazy shit